Some people think that by giving your dog rules and boundaries, it takes away from their character. For example, allowing your dog on the couch.
The dog being on the furniture isn't the real problem. The problem is that there must be a time and place for everything. When your dog has respect for furniture, like anything else you expose him to, he will act accordingly and appropriately.
Your dog should understand that the couch represents calmness and not excitement, therefore lessening the chance of possessiveness and other issues that might arise from allowing the dog to freely bound onto the couch.
All these issues translate to the car, the bed, etc.
The more you set your dog up to succeed, the easier your dog will have transitioning through situations he's not accustomed to.
As with all of my advice and teachings, everyone in your family must be on the same page for establishing and enforcing rules.
Remember, "Confidence. Patience. Consistency."